Letting In The Green Monster Of Doubt

October 19, 2019/Heather Plant

Letting In The Green Monster Of Doubt

Have you ever had that day, that normal typical nothing too unusual day that was going fine, maybe good, but not exceptionally great. Then, out of the blue, you get hit by something, not literally, but more of a metaphorical storm occurrence that allows you to start to fixate over and over. A storm of self doubt. That oh so lovely green monster of self pity hitting you like a huge tidal wave. It’s not like it’s some new occurrence of an event. It’s an unfortunate feeling that’s always present, no matter how Zen we try live.

It’s a shit storm that shows up unapologetically, clearly unwelcomed, but feels free to take right over the normal day you just had minding your own business. A warning would have been nice, but it’s not like running and hiding would have warded off the inevitable. It’s not like being a truly enlightened being would even allow us to vacate the unavoidable. After all we are all still just souls living in human bodies. Still destined to experience the oh so lovely emotions in full force now and then.

Doubt however, is a nasty storm. One whose roots are entangled with fear. Oh ya, that’s a real nasty one. One I prefer to avoid if I can at all costs. I have spent the past few decades working on so many personal ones; ones I prefer to not give the respective energy of naming as those books have been burned. Incinerated into the abyss of oblivion I hope. But doubt, it’s a greedy one. It’s all about our personal ego. The ego that taps you on your back when you least expect it just to remind you like a very annoying intimidation tactic.

Doubt is riddled with all our ego wants us to remind us of to hold us back. Stop us in our tracks whenever we begin to start walking forward like the Fool in the Tarot as we take our first steps on our path. Our ego shows up, shaking and rattling the mind trying to stop us in our tracks. Don’t follow the yellow brick road it screams at it’s core. Don’t follow your true path lying before you that requires movement and change.

Doubt creeps in yelling at you… “you are nobody; you are not good enough. There are so many others better than you. Just lay down and give in. Forget that path, and instead just stay in your miserable mundane ordinary life”.

The sad thing is it’s so convincing. It can feel so damn hard to shake it away and release it. To purge it from your soul and stop it from taking over and actually stop you from taking that step forward. Facing the world, revealing yourself in all your nakedness is so utterly terrifying. Will I be good enough. Will I be liked. Will I make a fool of myself. Will I succeed.

But then …my inner voice reminds me…

Know that you, YOU, are the one who put the chains there. Only your own ego is to blame. Grab those chains and toss them in the fire and embrace the flame creating your own transformation. Embrace that will as if it’s the strongest of all swords and that it can cut through any chain that tries to bind you in your way.

Free yourself; love yourself; embrace your truths.

Trust me I know, it’s hard, but with the spark we have a flame. Let that flame ignite your fire and burn it all away.

The interesting thing about will is at it’s core your will is your DESIRE. It is truly your deep down truth that resonates to your core of who you are. It’s what you want, your internal spark, your driving force. Your will is an element to embrace as without it you have no passion. It’s the flame for your spark. The whole element of fire. It is transformation itself.

So remember your inner spark in those moments of doubt where you are being held back like you are chained to the Earth unable to move forward.

Let your spark free and be the flame to your desires!